Day 12: What Not To ExpectPhotobucket - Video and Image Hosting

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Putting that Backfield in Motion since 2003

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Nursing me with her eyes

Yesterday it was so stinkin' hot that I set the kiddie pool up in the front yard because that was the only place I could find shade. Not only did it mean fun in the sun for me and Gavin to splish and splash while Grace remained cool as a cucumber on our porch, it meant sporting a bikini for all my neighbors to see. While I did recently vote to pass the homeowner's association by laws, truthfully? I'm a little foggy on the details. I'm telling you people, until there are 38 hours in the day, unless it contributes something worthwhile to keeping the kids from screaming, I'm not doing it.

I know there is something in the by laws about fences being only this tall and storage buildings being only that color but whether or not a woman who has had two kids in two years and is all flippity and floppity where things aren't supposed to be flippity floppity (Am I the only person who can nurse for almost a year and never move beyond an A cup??) is allowed to prance about in a bikini for all the neighbors to see is allowed, I can't be certain. Being the rebel that I am and the pool in the front yard was one of those things that kept the kids from screaming, I did it anyway.

Fortunately, the neighborhood was pretty dead so I didn't see any of me neighbors and they didn't have to see me. Grace, however, was captivated. She couldn't take her eyes off me. I'm not one of these earth mothers who runs around the house nekkid with a baby on my boob. I get nekkid for the shower and that's about it. (Ok, there's one other thing but this is a family blog and I would rather not discuss the hot beef injection with the whole internet. Hiding the salami is a personal thing between only me and my husband. Please respect my desire to not discuss the horizontal tango with all of you.) The only time Grace sees some skin is when she is being nursed. Especially when we used to cosleep I would just sleep topless to make her hours of torture nursing as easy as possible.

When I picked Grace up to take her outside she literally tried to latch onto my belly. I was showing skin so it must mean time to nurse, right? If I walked past her she started clapping and waving and reaching out for me like "Here comes the boobies!!!!!!" and would scream when I kept on walking. When I was in the pool with Gavin I kept imagining she was looking at me the way Sylvester looked at Tweety and imagined the yellow bird as a slow roasted chicken in a cage. I swear, she even licked her lips. It was quite uncomfortable. As a nursing mom, walking around half naked in front of a nursing baby is like dangling a piece of steak in front of a man who hasn't eaten in a month.

I feel so violated.

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7 Comments:

Blogger Jill said...

(Ok, there's one other thing but this is a family blog and I would rather not discuss the hot beef injection with the whole internet. Hiding the salami is a personal thing between only me and my husband. Please respect my desire to not discuss the horizontal tango with all of you.)

LMAO!!! Thanx for that!!!

4:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, it's not a bad idea to get children used to seeing skin. It may let Grace realize that 'skin' doesn't mean dinner, and also that there is nothing to be ashamed of. Obviously as they get bigger (i'm talking about your children of course...) you have to show some discretion, but naked is great, and it teaches kids anatomy early. My daughter knew boys from girls around 20 months, and knew all the proper terminology.

5:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

by the way... that is THE NASTIEST photo of baby poop i've ever seen... as moms, we've all seen that happen, but to post it???

5:23 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

You're welcome, Jill!

Thanks for your insight, anon, and you bring up great points. That said, I have no problem with my kids seeing me naked but I have a problem with seeing me naked so clothed it is. The kids see the husband naked all the time so they'll at least have the male anatomy down pat.

5:24 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

Yo anon, my blog, my poop picture. You don't like it, don't let the back button hit you in where the good Lord split you.

5:25 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

I think the poop picture is funny. And truthful. And the boobs. Yes Joshua still looks at them like he misses them. And it's not going to happen big boy.

3:49 AM  
Blogger alimum said...

You know, my son kinda got this way about my chest for awhile. A friend of mine commented that he was a genius of a boy because he already knew mommy had a great rack and the appropriate response was to launch himself, headfirst, at the aforementioned rack now, while that sort of behavior was still marginally acceptable.

4:46 PM  

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