Day 12: What Not To ExpectPhotobucket - Video and Image Hosting

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Officially a Mom

Putting that Backfield in Motion since 2003

Monday, January 29, 2007

The "Officially a Mom" Diet

Alright, folks. I have finally decided to write a diet book for all those mom out there wanting to lose the baby weight. It is based upon years of extensive research, personal experience, and cutting-edge nutritional science. I have even made an easy to follow photo tutorial for the laymans.

Step 1.

Prepare something to eat. Doesn't matter what it is. You can eat whatever you want on this diet. The only caveat is that your children MUST be nearby when you are eating.

Step 2.

Sit down to eat.

This is where the magic happens. Once your children see you with food, they will quickly shun whatever is on their plates in favor of whatever it is you are eating. Like lions circling a gazelle, they will move in closer and closer and then finally....

Step 3.

For every bite you take, give the kids three... or four.... or hell, give them the whole thing if it keeps them from screaming their heads off.

Photo tutorial:

My personal trainers

What do you think?

I'm going to make millions!!!

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Blogger Alicia said...

Hey, I am on this diet too! Just made a sandwich, baby ran off with most of it. Too lazy to make a new one.

10:05 AM  
Blogger Mimi said...

I'm on this diet too! But I do have one variation... I can prepare dinner for my family and the moment I sit down , I have to get up to get juice, milk, another fork, bread, more chicken (or whatever) so by the time I get to eat my meal it's all cold and congealed and not very appetizing -- plus everyone else is done so I take a bite, then do dishes, give kids baths, etc...

10:53 AM  
Blogger Heather said...

Heck, I'm on a diet and I didn't even realize it! You made me laugh. This is so true - maybe once my second one starts eating real food I'll actually start losing weight.

11:22 AM  
Blogger Judy said...

Oh, ain't that the truth! And since it takes twice as long to prepare or eat something, that's even more there.

Too funny.

2:30 PM  
Blogger Chrissy121875 said...

LOL! All my friends who are mommies tell me that they are on the same diet you just mentioned! Hubby and I just got married this year, so I'll have to wait a bit to go on that diet :)

I just love your Flickr photos! You are such a talented photographer!! Oh, and your kids are so darn cute!

3:06 PM  
Anonymous kerrianne said...

Brilliant! I love it. Now, if only I had some kiddos to steal my foodstuffs. Hmmm....

; )

3:11 PM  
Anonymous Ally said...

Oh yeah. This morning the first round of eggs made/eaten was mom: 0, Jamie: 3. Round two was mom: 2, Jamie: 0, but only because I crammed them in my mouth while they were still too hot for him to eat.

Also, a great way to lose 3 lbs. in one week is to have stomach flu over for a visit and invite it to stay all week! You'll be too busy either a) cleaning up puke or b) puking yourself to eat a thing.

4:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ha! I have been wondering how long it would take for you to comment on this phenomena! I know Sex and the City had a scene describing this very diet a few years back, so you might have a fight over the patent on it:)

I used to be a huge breakfast eater. Now, if I down an apple while driving the boys to school, I feel like I am doing good.


5:55 PM  
Blogger mamalife said...

Very Funny! I think you're onto something... move aside Dr. Atkins, South Beach, and Sommersize!

10:38 PM  
Blogger denise said...

LOL! I can't believe I didn't come read your blog sooner! :)

12:31 AM  

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